It has been said that “the most common component to achieving any type of intimacy is effective communication skills” (Marriage Team Coaching Manual). Prayer is essentially communicating with God; therefore, through prayer (i.e. direct communication with God) we build intimacy with Him. That is generally not a hard point to grasp. What many do fail to realize is that praying to God can be a means of developing intimacy with your spouse.
Teddy and Tina Campbell, in a recent interview for Young Married Christian, shared how prayer did just that. After Teddy’s infidelity, Tina wanted nothing to do with him sexually, even after making a decision to work on their marriage. After being mentored by a trusted Christian couple, the two decided to try prayer. They interceded individually and corporately for each other and their marriage, and something beautiful happened. Tina found her heart changing towards her spouse. She recounts, “When we were praying I saw a good man who made a bad choice…I saw a man who loved his family and loved his God and did not want to be what he was…I believe I saw him through God’s lens when we were in prayer, and that made him very attractive to me.”
I believe I saw him through God’s lens when we were in prayer, and that made [my husband] very attractive to me.
Tina Campbell
If that wasn’t enough to make you believe in the intimacy-building power of prayer, here are 6 key ways prayer can build intimacy with your significant other.
1. Prayer builds trust.
When you know your spouse has your best interests at heart, it helps to build trust with one another. One of our followers wrote, “[My husband praying for me] makes me trust that he’ll always have my back and it makes me feel like he loves me just like how the Father does.”
2. Prayer makes you feel loved.
Knowing that someone is talking to God about you and seeking God on your behalf is deeply comforting and reassuring. It makes you feel cared for in a deeply personal way.
A follower wrote, “Knowing that he covers me, especially in sickness, makes me feel protected, loved and cared for even more.”
Another wife added, “When my husband prays for me I feel loved and protected so it builds emotional intimacy. And when either of us prayers specifically about the sex act, that encounter tends to be [amazing].”
When my husband prays for me I feel loved and protected so it builds emotional intimacy. And when either of us prayers specifically about the sex act, that encounter tends to be [amazing].
Wife HER! Member
3. Prayer builds your spiritual bond.
The Word says, “How can two walk together unless they agree?” When you come together in prayer you voice your agreement before the Father, which strengthens your bond. Listening to each other’s prayers is also empowering and faith-building.
One wife wrote, “I feels like it strengthens our spiritual bond and builds trust between us.”
4. Prayer helps you see them as God sees them.
You can’t be mad at someone you are praying for. It just won’t work. Overtime your heart will soften towards them as you begin to see them through God’s eyes. Praying for your spouse keeps your heart sensitive towards them and makes it easier to forgive. This means that all the pent up issues that can slowly destroy a marriage dissipate as you extend grace to each other.
5. Prayer builds security.
Security is defined as “the state of being free from danger or threat.” Prayer is a protective measure that guards your marriage and protects your family, especially when your prayers are directed in this manner. One wife writes, “Prayer builds intimacy and it also builds security (mostly for the woman) knowing that her man has her covered naturally and spiritually.”
Another wife writes, “When my husband prays for me I feel like I have a double armor on.” Now that’s protection!
6. Prayer is attractive.
There is nothing like seeing your husband surrendered to the Lord. It makes it much easier to submit to, respect and love a man like that.
Here is what two wives had to say:
- “It’s a major turn on too…makes me want to jump him!”
- “It builds intimacy and makes me feel more attracted to him that he’ll make time to cover me in prayer. It makes me want to have this man’s baby!”
Watch the full video with Teddy and Tiny Campbell here: